Logical Reasoning - Dan Cassenti, Novelist

Concept: Narcissists don’t have a universal inability to apply logical reasoning. After all, narcissists use logical reasoning when planning to manipulate others. Logical reasoning often breaks down when it’s convenient to narcissists. Any time logic defies a false narrative, narcissists distract themselves with finding a means of escaping the inevitable damage to the narrative. This overloads their short-term memory capacity and diverts attention away from communications. Experiencing the narcissist’s resulting confusion and inability to follow simple logical connections may make the speaker believe that an otherwise intelligent narcissist is just playing dumb. That may be the case, but it’s also possible the narcissist can’t follow the logic due to cognitive limitations on attention and short-term memory. Either way, it can legitimately lead to frustration on the speaker’s part. At the root of the problem is belief-based reasoning, reasoning that starts with a belief (e.g., “I am superior on every level to everyone else) and then only allows acceptance of assertions that support the belief. This deviates from logical reasoning because conclusions are meant to derive from the premises, not the other way around.

How this hurts the narcissist: A deficit in the primary tool used to understand the world when there is a chance to learn and act more effectively in the future leads to confusion, distress, and a lack of learning that hurts narcissists in life.

Examples:

A man explains to his girlfriend why seeing her ex without letting him know hurt his feelings, even if they didn’t have plans that day. She accuses him of being untrusting and steers the conversation to ways of helping him overcome his propensity for jealousy.
“What are you talking about? You’re bringing up all these points, and I don’t see how they’re connected,” Sara said. When Bill tries to explain, she keeps interrupting him with more questions until he loses track of the point.
At a press conference, a politician keeps telling reporters their questions make no sense, and he has to move on whenever the topic turns into an illegal action he took.

Advice: If you feel the urge to explain something to a narcissist that defies their false narratives, suppress the urge. If you go forward, you won’t get the narcissist to understand your position, leading to mutual frustration. Instead, stay steady in your reasoned position and leave narcissists to their delusions, minimizing words and information conveyed to as close to zero as possible.

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